Mr Chair x Piggeh - Gardening and Bathing
by TheSkySpiritsTalentShow
Summary: What starts out as a harmless gardening session between two friends evolves into something more...XP One Shot. Warning: Suggestive yaoi. 3


"Chaise! Chaise, are you out here?"

The brunette sighed, dropping the shovel. Looks like his peaceful gardening time was over. He stood up and walked on the dirt path that led out of his flower patch, careful not to step on any newly planted seeds.

A little while back he had found a grassy area surrounded by a few bushes and Jennifers and decided to make it his own personal little garden. Unlike others in Brennanburg, Mr Chair´s sanity was fragile and he enjoyed passing his time with the most humane, relaxing ways so he won´t go completely berserk in the dark, musty castle.

When he came to the border of rocks, he saw his friend Piggeh standing there, grinning happily at him. Piggeh was a humanoid dead pig, with pink hair and eyes. His rosy attire was torn, showing off his decaying flesh. The only two noticeable pig features was the velvet ears perched on top of his head and the ringed tail curling out from a (ripped) hole in his pants.

"Hi Chaise! I´ve been looking everywhere for you!" The pig said, hugging the other.

"I was here all along."

"I know that now! Jennifer told me! What are you doing out here, all by yourself?"

"I´m gardening." Chaise said simply. It´s not like he didn´t like Piggeh, but the guy was a perv and a loud one too. Plus, he might trample all over the freshly planted plants.

"Cool, can I help?"

"Well…."

"Please? Stephano kicked me out of his room again because I was, quote ´annoying him´. As if he is any less annoying. Plus I´m soo bored! I have nothing to do!"

"Gardening requires much care and love for the plants, Piggeh." As soon as he said it, Mr Chair knew they were the wrong choice of words.

"Oh I can show them love alright." The pig said, grinning seductively.

"Piggeh…."

"I can be very careful too. Come on, Chaise~!"

"Fine!" Chaise sighed.

"Yea! Now, what should I do first?"

The brunette looked around, trying to decide which job would do the least damage. "You could help me dig the holes for the seeds."

Piggeh nodded enthusiastically. "Okay!" He grabbed the shovel lying in Chaise´s bucket of tools and followed his bro to the farthest end of garden. He was impressed at the rows and rows of flowers and herbs the other had already planted.

Mr Chair stopped next to a stone boulder and took out a small package of seeds that said "Poppies".

"What are Poppies?" Piggeh asked.

"They´re red flowers, really pretty. Their seeds are also used for baking, like in Viennese Cuisines." Chaise said, kneeling down at the patch of dirt. His bro did the same.

"Okay, now all you have to do is create holes big enough for one seed. And make sure to have space between the seeds so they can grow better."

"Alright!" Piggeh said. He did as he was told.

Mr Chair watched him, correcting mistakes when he spotted them. Piggeh worked fast, but careful much to the surprise of the other.

"Done!" The pig said after a while.

"Now all we need to do is plant the seeds." Chaise said. He opened the package and explained how each hole has to be filled, covered and watered.

They worked together for hours, sharing jokes and stories and from Piggeh´s side, a couple of flirts.

"You´re so good at planting seeds, Chair~." He said. The brunette blushed slightly and nodded.

"Yeah, gardening is my hob-" He stopped when he saw Piggeh´s grin and felt his blush heat up even more as he realized it.

The other laughed. "Haha, get it? Planting seeds? I am a professional at dirty jokes, aren´t I? Haha!"

"Piggeh, that´s nasty!"

"No it isn´t." Said corpse grinned and continued working.

Chaise lowered his gaze back to his shovel. "Why are you always so perverted?" He asked.

No answer.

The brunette looked up and saw the pink eyes were much closer to his then they were five seconds ago.

They were so full of adoration and want, it made Mr Chair a bit uncomfortable.

"P-pigg-"

Piggeh scooted closer to him and placed his dirt covered hands on the other´s face, pulling him close for a kiss.

"…" Chaise honestly didn´t think his face could get any warmer. It felt so strange and frightening, kissing his best friend, but at the same time it felt so good. He didn´t even know why this was happening, but then again, it´s Piggeh. Maybe that pig got too damn horny and his own dirty joke sent him over the edge. But the way Piggeh´s hands were gently holding his head, thumbs caressing his cheeks, the brunette couldn´t help but wonder if there was more to it.

He nervously fiddled with the handle of the shovel, jumping when he felt a rough tongue against his teeth.

Unsure of what Piggeh wanted, Mr Chair opened his mouth to ask him. Immediately the tongue slid into his mouth and he let out a small squeak.

"Hmmm…" Piggeh hummed softly, his pink muscle moving around against the other´s gums and cheeks. He finally pulled away, smirking slightly through half lidded eyes when he saw the red flush on Chaise´s face.

Said brunette quickly looked down again, his heart thumping in his ears as he searched for a way to break the hellish awkwardness.

"Are we done? I´ve had enough of gardening for today." Piggeh said cheerfully, as if nothing happened. Mr Chair nodded and heard the other stand up and started putting tools in the tool bucket. A few moments of gathering later, he joined him.

They packed together quickly and left the garden. Piggeh never said anything else about the kiss, again, as if it didn´t exist and started talking about what his choice for dinner would be.

´Maybe there is a way to forget this whole thing´, Mr Chair thought. ´Hopefully Jennifer didn´t see anything and if she did, she better not tell anyone else. Sweet Irish Leather, did I just kiss Piggeh?!´

"Hello, earth to the Chair?"

"Huh? Sorry what?"

The pig grinned. "I asked you what you´re going to do now."

"I-I´ll probably j-just…um…I´m going to take a bath then get ready for bed. I´m tired."

"No dinner?"

"No, I´m too tired. Excuse me. Goodnight Piggeh." Chaise squeezed past his friend into the castle and hurried up the stairs.

Once inside his bathroom, Chaise shut the door.

"Holy…what just happened?" He groaned out load. He ran his tongue over his lips, tasting salt and a hint of sweet rot. Somehow, he didn´t mind. He didn´t mind that he could still feel Piggeh´s tongue against his and the soft stroke of a thumb against his cheek.

He found himself wishing that it had lasted longer. Or that Piggeh had said something about the kiss before walking away. Because if he had, Mr Chair could pretend that he wasn´t another sex object for the pig to play with.

The brunette shook his head as if to clear it and walked over the bathtub. Why Brennanburg even had running water was a mystery to him, but Mr Chair enjoyed long hot baths with a good book. They relaxed him and took his mind off disturbing events. Right now, that was exactly what he needed.

His slender fingers made quick worth of his clothes, tossing them over an iron pipe sticking out of the wall. His boxers stayed on though. Being fairly shy from nature, Chaise didn´t like the feeling of being so exposed and vulnerable, especially not with all the horrors of the Teleporting Naked Guys he had encountered in earlier times.

He climbed in, grabbing a bar of soap on the way and let the warm water swish against his skin. The brunette leaned back and relaxed, closing his eyes. He enjoyed the feeling of being cleansed of dirt and stress for a good ten minutes. Then he felt the water shift.

Mr Chair sat up instantly. The TNG couldn´t come in here right? And it couldn´t be a Barrel or a monster, they´re too loud for a stealthy sneak in.

It wasn´t a monster. It was Piggeh. That little fucker had found some way into the bathroom and was sitting in the tub, stripped down to his underwear, smirking at the other´s shocked expression.

"P-Piggeh!" Chaise squeaked, his voice higher than normal.

"Sup, Chair? Thought I would join you in bathing…cuz you know…I´m dirty too and I didn´t want to wait for the bathroom to be free…"

Mr Chair tried to find his voice to demand that Piggeh left the room, the pig would probably do it if he asked sternly enough. Unfortunately, he doubted he could muster up enough strength to do so.

The pinkette grinned lazily, leaning forward and reaching for the soap bar. "Great to hear you have nothing against my little visit…" He said and started scrubbing himself with the bar.

Chaise opened his mouth and closed it again as his protest still refused to be audible. His brown eyes followed the soap bar to have at least something to focus on. He blinked in surprise when he realized where it was heading and he couldn´t help but fidget a little, earning a loud chuckle.

The pig smirked at his bro´s face and tilted his head back a bit.

"You like it when I rub myself with the soap? You like that, Chair~?" He said.

Chaise, the warmth back on his cheeks and other places, nodded silently.

As if he were waiting for the signal, Piggeh got on his knees, kneeling in front the brunette. He started rubbing the soap on the other´s chest.

He chuckled again when the body underneath his hand tensed up and a small yelp was heard. But no hand shot up to push the offending hand away and Piggeh took that as a green light to continue. He removed his left hand from the soap and reached up to caress the other´s cheek.

"You´re so beautiful, Chaise." He said.

"…" Mr Chair couldn´t think of anything to respond and even if, he wasn´t sure his vocal chords were working right now. However, he could feel a spark of pure happiness underneath his arousal and apprehension.

Piggeh grinned understandingly and concentrated on scrubbing his friend clean. Even if he fooled around a bit, in the end the brunette was as good as new.

"Th-thanks P-"

"I´m not done yet, Chair~" The pig turned on the showerhead and grabbed a shampoo bottle. He smirked seductively and scooted up closer. The pinkette unscrewed the top and poured some pine scented shampoo over his bro´s brown hair. Long fingers followed right after, gently massaging the scalp underneath.

Chaise didn´t want to, but his eyes shut and he let Piggeh take over. It probably wasn´t wise, to let up his guard around the pervert but he couldn´t help it, everything felt just too good. The warm water all around them, the smell of a rainy forest and Piggeh, sitting on his lap, pressed against him.

The pinkette watched his friend´s features soften, a light smile occupying the blush. He was just too adorable, Piggeh decided and leaned over, kissing him. He felt the other jump once again, but this time Mr Chair shyly kissed back.

Ecstatic by the positive feedback, the corpse removed his fingers from the chair´s head and, after washing out all the soap to avoid stinging eyes, grabbed Chaise´s legs and pulled firmly.

"Wh-what?" The brunette asked startled. Piggeh pulled on his legs until Mr Chair was almost lying down completely, then settled back to sit on the other´s thighs.

"Piggeh?"

"Shhhh…just go with the flow." The pig smirked deviously, before his hands wandered to Chaise´s boxers. "There´s one other place we´ve forgotten to clean~…"


End file.
